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Michael considered fate at 11:34   |   Permalink   |   Post a Comment

In Montreal, with four roommates, we had little trouble keeping track of the remote.

Every once in awhile someone would accidentally bring it into the kitchen and someone would later find it on the counter and return it to the living room.

Back home, at my parents house, I once brought the remote to the bathroom with me. Later, as I searched for it, I found it next to the sink.

Today, however, living at 166 is not so easy. It is the land of lost remotes. Once, in 2002, the remote was lost in the fold up couch for over a month. It could have been two - I'm not quite sure. At one point I even unfolded the couch and search amongst the crumpled sheets to no avail. It wasn't until much later that my roommate was victorious in the search for the remote. The length of time that the remote went missing could be attributed to the fact that it was the digital cable remote and we could therefore still use the actual tv remote as a sort of kludge. Whatever - it kept my ass on the couch anyway.

However, about four months ago I went to watch some tv and I found the tv remote missing. This was disconcerting because we had gotten ride of the digital cable by then and the tv remote was my only hope. I did a quick sweep of the area but found little. I was forced to stand in front of the tv pushing those little channel up, channel down buttons on the front of the unit until I found a program I could live with. I was also forced to watch commercials.

Four months later - today - and the remote is still missing. I have checked the fold out couch, I have checked the bathroom, I have checked the drain trap in the kitchen sink. I have searched the bedrooms and the closets, I have searched the cupboards and the drawers. I have screamed in agony - in sheer pain - at the loss of my remote.

It is still missing.

My only solace is that perhaps it has found a better home. Perhaps it has found a family that watches hours upon hours of tv every waking moment. Perhaps it has found a place where people will give it attention. Maybe, just maybe, we were bad remote owners. Maybe it ran away from home.