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Michael considered fate at 18:19   |   Permalink   |   Post a Comment

Tony started another link auction. He claims a link on his page is worth $48 or something like that - based on Blogshares anyway. But that's sort of vague. First, he's only putting it up for a month. There isn't anything with blogshares that really takes time into account - as far as worth goes. Time, as someone once said, is the biggest asset of youth today. You can't just disregard time. Secondly, blogshares doesn't take into account link positioning. It's like billboard space - the higher up on the page the more it's worth. And thirdly, he is putting it up for the month of May - the month where, as he points out, a lotta cool ass people were born. Like Bunnie. And Joe Namath. And your fine friend Michael. How can you put a value on the month of May?

May 31st, in case anyone is wondering. Gemini. Turning the ripe old age of 25, along with the Bunster too. 25 might be a rough one. I've thought about 25 a lot and I think it's going to hurt. I could be wrong, though. I thought 20 was going to hurt and it was an alright time. And 18 was overrated. I'm not looking forward to middle age but some numbers just sound right. 27. 58. 64. All good years, I bet.

29 is gonna suck.

Broke down last night and fell off the wagon. I was feeling pretty good about it too since I'd braved a few visits to the bar and come away clean for two straight weeks. There was just too much going on and too many people to see though, so I slipped and had a few. Skipped dinner so I figured I'd go with Guinness - Appetizer, Entree, and Desert. But this morning I remember why I stopped in the first place - I'm old. My body doesn't recover like it used to. I wasn't feeling horrible but I was feeling a little out of it and it just pissed me off. Late nights, no sleep, and drugs tend to wear one out. This weeks been brutal.

It also pisses me off that I can't do anything half-assed. I can't just cut back on the drink - I gotta stop altogether. It's part of the personality I guess. Black and White. That used to be my out with the parents. I'd insist on them giving ridiculusly strict rules so things were clear - black and white. But they wouldn't do it cause they'd feel guilty and then when I did something they didn't like I could point to the score board and tell them I didn't really break a rule. No error. No foul.

Kids are evil little bastards. Kids can be pretty damn cruel. 38% of gay surveyed teens in the USA-Today Weekend had experienced verbal and physical abuse from their peers whereas only 8% of straight teens had a problem.

A guy I know used to wear home-made clothes. He'd go to school and wear his gym socks up high and he got made fun of. But sometimes kids can't help it. They're just mean. They're feeling out the waters and learning how to interact and feelings are bound to be hurt. Sometimes you just gotta spend a little money and work a little harder and be a littler jerkier if you want to fit into that crowd. Sometimes you gotta make some sacrifices and maybe take some hazing and soon enough it'll be you with that paddle - right where you wanted to be. Making someone else feel like shit.

Afterall - Putting others down makes me feel better.