and she said.. "how you interpret the dream is probably more important than the dream itself"

It's been about 20 days since I chewed my last fingernail. If you'll recall, I informed the world here, 20 days ago, that I promised myself I would stop chewing my fingernails. I wrote it and I repeated it and then I walked away and mostly forgot about it and now, 20 days later, I haven't chewed a fingernail yet. It's really quite amazing because I haven't been hankering and I haven't even noticed and it wasn't, for the most part, any sort of work to pull off. It just sort of happened.

The problem, however, with trying to quite chewing your nails is that having no nail clippers in the house leads quickly to having very long fingernails.. and I don't have to tell you that the most inviting thing for a nail-biter is some luciously long fingernails to hanker on. Especially if it's been 20 days.

And after awhile it becomes pretty unruly, anyhow. After you're done leaving the house and when you can't even button your jeans cause they get in the way and after you do the howard hughes bit for awhile with the creepy curled and hanging look.. well.. even the most non-nail-biting person ever in the world... don't tell me they wouldn't want to nibble the damn things off. Just to get rid of them. Just to free one's self from the shackles of creepy long curled and twisted fingernails.

It's funny we call them nails because they're really not that at all. Cats don't have nails and dogs don't have nails. Bears and hawks and goats, neither. Makes you wonder why we called them nails. They're flat and brittle and not particularly good for much and certainly residual in the human tail bone sort of way and we come out with nails? That's the best we can do? I think maybe hardened cuticular bed sounds better. Think about it.. it sort of rolls off the tongue really;

"Hey, joe, you still biting your hardened cuticular beds?"

"Oh yah man, I can't quit"

and

"Hey man, can you scratch your hardened cuticular beds on my back?"

and even

"Hey, stop at the store - I need to pick up some hardened cuticular bed polish"

Yah see? Much better than nails. Nails makes it sound like you're chewing on metal. Nails is harsh - cold. No personality in that. Hardened cuticular bed.. now that's a name.