and she said.. "how you interpret the dream is probably more important than the dream itself"

Just one week in this city and I'm ready to run. Everything is hot, grimy, and I forget how dingy even a clean(er) city like montreal can be. Bus stops filled with random garbage, trash on the streets, filthy old furniture abandoned on the sidewalk.. It's enough to make me want to crawl right out of my skin and, if I am smart, I will remember this and somewhere in the future when I'm looking to settle down - you know, actually buy a house (it's the american way) - I'll know enough not to do it in a big city.

Don't get me wrong, big cities have a whole heck of a lot to offer. Nightlife - bars and restuarants and concerts and street fairs. Jobs. Access.. but it starts to get fuzzy from there and the opportunity cost comes a-knockin', wondering why you're not enjoying the nice outdoor green space in front of your house - oh, you don't have one. The opportunity cost comes by and asks you how come you're getting up so early and you sigh and complain about the traffic and the commute and opportunity cost asks why you're paying so goddamn much in rent.

I don't know, frankly, I don't know. Just seems like the thing to do, you know? All the kids are doing it so gee, I must head for the big city, make my mark, be an international man of mystery.

et cetera

The big city just isn't for me. Great for visiting. Great for college maybe and even as a summer gig but me, I can't do it. I can't see the weigh-out tipping in favour of smog and bums and overpriced product and parking tickets up the wazoo.

So I'm doomed? No, I'll manage. We're survivalists, us humans.. able to live in the most wretched of situations and even I, as lazy and unmotivated as I might be, even I can manage up here in the land of milk and hockey. I can manage by spacing out my trips home so that there is always a country fix within sight. I can manage by keeping my head down till the real weather comes and it's cold enough out that the streets are a little less crowded and I can move around again. I can manage by working, sticking to the important stuff, and just hanging on for dear life until I look up and realize two years have flown by faster than a squadron of blue angels.

Even I will survive.