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Michael considered fate at 16:27   |   Permalink   |   Post a Comment

I've made exactly two blogging mistakes in my life.

The first was using the made up moniker gunge, which has resulted in a multitude of sick european perverts looking for pictures through the use of such search terms as "naked gunge girls". Apparently gunge is akin to Nick's old you-can't-do-that-on-television green slime, only for dirty adults who pay in euros. I'll admit the phenom never really peaked my interest and I've done little to no research into the substance so I have nothing more to say on it here. Except to tell the europeans to look elsewhere for their strange fetish smut.

The second mistake was using the term hurricane in a metaphor for love, the result of which has been a barrage of site hits from middle-america school kids plagarizing researching their next science report. Here's a heads up kids: unless you're writing a report titled "The use of weather terminology as broken-heart simile in modern-day online diary texts" then this is probably not where you want to be. In fact, step away from this site altogether.. move along. You wouldn't want to get in trouble for looking at smutty gunge fucks, would you?

The internet is a strange place if for nothing else than it's pure mixing potential. Hillbilly Billy-joe need only clean up her grammar enough to sound semi-intelligent and she can pass herself off as a neo-conservative DC freak. Learn nine of the ten commandments and you can become a religious zealot bent on fusing god and country.

Well, I'm neither of those things and I'm not particularly bent on anything. I'm happy enough to build pretty little graphs out of strange statistics I find on the information superhighway. I'm happy enough to whine about lost love and write bad poetry hidden within bad prose hidden deep among a bunch of bad blog posts which nobody ever reads. That's the beauty of making mistakes on a site like this..

There really aren't any consequences.