This Christmas season my household was tasked with taking care of a friend's pet. A feline, to be exact. Anyone who knows me can probably tell you that I like cats a lot and grew up with many over the years. However, there is something unique to
someone else's pet that just
.
In fact, Ronnie (of the female orange tabby variety) is relatively painless, and has but one questionable trait: a voracious thirst for conversation. This girl eclipses the term Chatty Cathy. A Chatty Catty Cathy, maybe. Generally, it's manageable in near the term, you just apply rapid head and neck scratching until she settles out. Sometimes she continues to chirp away, letting out bursts of - in quick staccato succession - these "cat mumbles" (stutters?).
Our last female feline was a bumbling Maine Coon who very well could have been special in that short bus sort of way, but who can be sure? She had her routines, she drooled when she purred, and was sent of to kitty heaven earlier than her time due to seizures or strokes - still a solid 15 years, but we're used to having them longer.
So whose to say a cat can't have a stutter, or a dog can't be OCD? They have Valium for pets, now.
But whatever I am doing with Ronnie, she seems to be gaining weight. Gaining a lot more weight than she should, anyway, in the two weeks we've had her. Okay, on to the evidence. The "Before" photos:
Now, on to the "After" photo. Note that the grass in the photo is the best solution we have for the moment, all-vegan diet. She's sniffed at it a few times and maybe tried a blade or two, but so far seems generally nonplussed.
Okay, truthfully I found a photo of a cat very similar-looking to Ronnie and I thought it would be funny to try and fool the owner with a frantic email to her with photographic evidence of her cat's obesity. I'll let you know how it goes over.